As we prepare to welcome in a new year, this is the perfect time to consider a plan for family disciple times with your family this coming year. Discipleship is intentional and will not happen by accident. Therefore if you don’t have a plan, it will likely not happen.

Discipling your children can feel like an overwhelming task for many parents. I encourage you to not overcomplicate it. Don’t get lost in the abundance of resources and trying to figure out the how of discipleship. I believe that more important than the how is the fact that you even do it at all. The goal of family devotions is to set a rhythm in your home of regularly opening God’s word and reading it and praying as a family. Your children will learn this pattern of studying scripture and know that this is a priority in your home. Our prayer is that one day, it will become a pattern in our children’s lives as they grow up and go out on their own.

During this final week of the year, make two decisions. First, pick a time that you want to try to gather your family together and study God’s word. It can be any time of day that works for your family and as often as you’d like during the week. Next, choose a devotional book to read through or a scripture reading plan or book of the Bible to study.

Keep this family time simple. Especially for younger children, reading a quick passage of scripture or through a short devotion and praying is enough. The older your children are, the more you can dive into discussions and questions and an even more meaningful prayer time. It’s also important to remember that this family devotion time is a small part of the overall discipleship of your children. Anytime you are with your children is an opportunity to point them to Jesus. Pour in the truths of God’s word during intentional family meeting times and then be ready to show your children how those truths work themselves out in everyday situations in their lives.

Discipleship is not going to always be easy or exciting. Busy schedules, uncooperative little ones, bad attitudes and feelings of inadequacy can easily deter us and steal our joy. Keep your eyes on Jesus and the long game of what you’re hoping to instill in your children. Prayerfully commit to making family discipleship a priority for your family this year and persevere through rough patches. I’m cheering for you! I hope 2022 is a wonderful year for you and your family!

Here are some resources that I recommend if you need some ideas to get started: (some of the links below are affiliated links)

Bible Reading Plans:

Foundations: A 260-day Bible reading plan. There is a book for adults and kids! There is also a New Testament reading plan. Kids who are able to read can do their daily reading and book activity on their own and then you can come together as a family to discuss the passage and pray.

The Jesus Storybook Bible [ad] – Every family of young kids should have this Bible. I’d recommend it for preschool age up through early elementary. It contains 44 stories from the Bible and helps kids understand the big story of scripture as each story points to Jesus.

Devotionals:

Marty Machowski writes some really fantastic books for families to use. Here are some options from him:

The Ology: Ancient Truths Ever New [ad]- this book uses a systematic theology approach to explaining hard biblical concepts to young children – we loved working through this book with our kids. Recommended for ages 6-12 years old.

WonderFull: Ancient Psalms Ever New [ad]- read, worship and pray through the Psalms with your kids!

Long Story Short [ad]- ten minute devotionals to draw your family to God. Suitable for kids preschool to high school. There is also an “Old Testament New” ten minute devotional book if you like this one!

Listen Up [ad] 10 Minutes Family Devotions on Parables and Wise Up [ad] 10 Minute Family Devotions in Proverbs is a two-part series geared toward 1st-6th grade kids.

Other devotional books I like:

Indescribable [ad] – 100 Devotions for Kids About God and Science – Louie Giglio has written three of these books. I like them because I have kids who love science and I love being able to point them to Jesus as we learn about how amazing our Creator is. Also check out “How Great is Our God” and “The Wonder of Creation.” Recommended for kids ages 6-10 but I used them for slightly younger kids as well.

Epic Devotions [ad] – 52 Weeks in the Story that Changed the World – this is a great devotional for older kids. Recommended for ages 8-12. My 9 year old boy enjoyed these devotions from Aaron Armstrong.

I AM: 40 Reasons to Trust God [ad] – study with your children some of the names of God or descriptive titles of God. This is recommended for kids ages 4-8. We also worked through the “Attributes of God” cards from Tiny Theologians. My kids memorized all 26 of them!

Schools have always been a hot topic for parents. For several reasons over the last year, including the pandemic and concerning curriculum choices, many parents are revaluating their school choices or feeling pressured to make the right decision now more than ever.

Is school choice important? Yes. Is it ultimate? No.

There’s a parent out there that needs to hear that today.

Parents put way too much pressure on themselves to make the right school choice for their kids. What a privilege it is that many of us even get to choose. Many parents are in situations where they feel like they don’t have a choice. Wherever you are in the process of choosing “the right” school for your children, take heart!

Here are three things that helped me as my husband and I wrestled through this decision over the past few months. 

What is right for other families is not necessarily right for your family.

Every child, every parent, every family dynamic and current life situation are different. There are so many reasons why families make the school decisions they make. These reasons range anywhere from financial and job situations to individual children’s needs to personal convictions and everything else in between. Hear me clearly. There are many good reasons to choose public school. There are many good reasons to choose private school. There are many good reasons to homeschool. 

It is not helpful to make blanket statements about what parents should do, say, believe, choose and so many other things. That’s true about most things when it comes to parenting but it’s definitely true about school choices. Statements like “If you’re a Christian you should ______” can actually be harmful. Every family has to make their own choice based on their own situation and it will be the right decision for them.

You can change your mind!

Your school choice does NOT have to be forever. If you start out in public school and it’s a horrible experience, you can pull your child out at any time! If you start out homeschooling and it’s awful, enroll the kids in school, mama! You are not a failure if you change your mind next week or next year. How freeing this realization was for me.

God is bigger than your school choice.

He is all powerful. Trust him with your children (Isaiah 26:3). You’re not going to “mess up your kids” because you sent them to public school, private school or because you homeschooled them. How naïve we are to think that if we control and orchestrate our child’s life just perfectly, that they will turn out just like we want them too. How little we believe God to think that we, as mere humans, could completely mess up His plan for our child’s life. I’m not dismissing the fact that we are called to disciple our children. We should absolutely take that role seriously because our children’s eternity is at stake. However, God can use any situation, any school, any mistake to draw our kids to himself.

Pray. Ask God for wisdom (James 1:5). Seek counsel from others if you feel the need. But in the end, make your decision and trust God that it’s the right decision for your family, for this season.

“Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you believe so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” Romans 15:13

As we slowly ease out of quarantine, many of us are excited to head back to our church campuses. While we have been grateful for online worship services, nothing can compare to worshiping together with our brothers and sisters. However, there will still be some restrictions and changes in how we are able to meet again. One of the things church leaders are having to consider is whether or not there will be any type of kids ministry related activities. If we’re all being honest, we know it will be impossible to have any type of social distancing or mask wearing on the preschool hallway.

Therefore, most families that choose to go back to church campuses in these early phases of the quarantine lift will be worshiping with their children in the service with them. For some families, like my own, this is nothing new. We have already been worshiping with our children for several years and this past year we added an infant to our circus. For other families, this will be a new experience and the idea of having children in the service with them can invoke feelings of anxiety and dread. To those who fit into the later category, I encourage you to fight the urge to just stay home and instead, make the effort to go to church (as long as you are not sick or immunocompromised of course.)

As I have reflected on my family’s experience, there have been several things we have learned along the way and plenty more to still learn. We have not worshiped perfectly with our kids and sometimes we have a bad attitude, but we are thankful for grace and we keep showing up and trying again. And while I prefer to have my children with me in the worship service (even with its challenges), I know for some families, this is not what they would choose. It will be a new and possibly frustrating experience. This can be a hard situation for parents, but it will also be challenging and possibly strange for the children who will experience a worship service for the very first time. I think it’s wise to prepare yourselves and your children in order to have the best experience possible. Whether you are parents that will put on your brave face and haul your own pile of kids to church when the doors reopen, the pastors that lead them or fellow church attenders, I hope these ideas will encourage and help you.

• It is vital to have your lead pastor speak from the pulpit (and ideally before you even meet again for the first time via email/website) about how they want children to feel welcome in the worship service. If you are a pastor or church leader, please do this! It is important for parents, children and everyone else to hear the pastor acknowledge that children are not simply present, but wanted in the service. It is helpful to hear the pastor say that he understands that children will wiggle, make noise, answer rhetorical questions… simply, that children will act like children. And that’s it’s not only tolerated but welcomed. My children hear this every week from our pastor and they have no doubt that they are an important part of the worship service, they are seen and they are valued. It will take pressure off the parents to have perfectly behaved children. It will also remind everyone else that they shouldn’t be bothered by children acting like children and it may even do them a bit of good and add a smile to their day.
• Give up on the idea that your children are going to sit quietly and respectfully for the entire service. It will bring so much freedom for you and them. Yes, there will be times you will have to correct and teach them. You can just go ahead and assume that you will have to get up at some point and take one or more of them out of the service for a while. Babies and toddlers are their own level of challenging and they are all different. The same things that work for my kids might not work for yours. And it will take a few weeks to figure out what works best for you and your children but it is worth the tension. You will work through the some of the rough spots and you will be amazed at what your kids CAN do and how much they truly will rise to the level that is expected of them.
• Prepare yourself and your kids. While we can go ahead and assume that your kids will not be perfect, it is still wise to set them up for success. Here are a few ideas to help with that:
  • Familiarize your children with how the worship service flows. What is the service order? When do you sing when do you listen? When do you sit and when do you stand? Explain and set clear expectations for your children. One thing my family has found to be beneficial is that our worship pastor sends out a link to the worship songs before Sunday. We can spend the week learning or reviewing the songs together. On Sunday morning when we start singing, my kids already know the songs and can join in easier. It’s one less thing that will seem foreign to them.
  • Feed your kids a large breakfast and bring a snack. That sounds so elementary but I promise you it makes a difference. Sunday mornings are chaos in our house and it’s all too easy to be halfway to church and realize one of the kids didn’t eat that morning. A good breakfast has to be a priority in our family and when my littles don’t have growling tummies, they can focus better and have a few less wiggles and whines. I also have a snack for them – we try to avoid sugar/candy and choose something that won’t make a mess and it’s usually in a zip lock or reusable bag so they won’t make so much noise opening it. The snack isn’t essential but it keeps my kids busy for a few minutes while they are still listening and it improves their behavior because “I’m hungry for lunch” is not as big of a factor.
  • Make sure they use the restroom or have a clean diaper before the service begins (occasionally I forget to do this and I regret it every time).
  • Teach them how to participate. Help them open their Bibles and find the passage. Whisper to them and explain what is happening and what is expected at each stage of the service. We try to sit somewhat near the front of the sanctuary so that my kids can see better and we will have less distractions around us. I also allow my preschooler to be held or to stand in his chair during the singing time. Why? Because he’s three feet tall and can’t see or hear anything that’s happening while surrounded by giant adults. Kids that can’t see or hear will naturally lose interest and start acting up. Can we honestly blame them for that? When my little guy is up higher, he can see the stage and the worship leader, he can see the screen even though he can’t read yet and he can hear the music and the voices of people singing around him – mostly he can hear ME sing. He’s learning that worshiping is important to me because I’m modeling it. He is also learning how to worship by watching and hearing his parents and others do it.
  • I make sure my kids always have something to keep their hands busy – a “busy bag” of sorts. My boys are five and eight years old. They are typical energetic, talkative wiggly boys. We start with a Kids Worship Bulletin and pencils/crayons etc. Our church has preprinted ones and they are available for us each week. We use the same generic one each week that includes things like “what is the date? Who is preaching today? What book of the bible is he preaching from? What words do you hear that you don’t understand? What questions do you have?” etc. You can also customize them based on the sermon points (like fill in the blank style), but that is extra work and it takes coordination with the pastor. We bring plenty of writing utensils and crayons. Books to look at or small, silent hand held toys can be helpful. I also purchased dry erase activity books and dry erase markers for my kids from the Dollar Tree, but of course you can get them anywhere. Another mess-free favorite for my boys are these water coloring books. For older kids, have a notebook and pen for them to take notes and encourage them to follow along in their own Bible.
• Ask if your church has a designated room or area that is a safe place for parents who do have to get up and take their kids out to regroup. Some kids will find this time super challenging, especially if it’s the first time being in the worship service and they may not be able to make it through the entire service. If you have to step out with your crying baby or children who are melting down, it will be tempting to leave and go home. Instead, if it’s available, utilize the designated room for that purpose and hopefully you’ll also have access to a live stream of the service so you won’t have to miss it entirely.

The idea of having children in the worship service with adults is a big culture shift for a lot of churches. We have to move away from viewing worship services as an “adult” event that kids aren’t ready for or as an inconvenience we can’t wait to do away with again. Instead, we can choose to view worshiping with our children as part of our God-given role in discipling them and seeing them as a valuable part of the church and that their inclusion in our services is vital. A big part of how this new experience will go for your family is how you as the parent think, talk and interact with your kids about it. Sure, it also matters how your pastor and fellow church attenders think, speak and act but as the primary influencer of your children, this can be a defining moment. Instead of seeing this time as inconvenient and frustrating, view it as a blessing and a privilege. You get to be (not have to be) the one that shows your children what worship to God is, how to do it and that worshiping Him is important to you. What an honor!

When we are under a greater amount of stress than normal and our emotions are heightened, we often respond more extremely to things than we would under normal circumstances.

Since the COVID-19 outbreak, the criticism by frustrated individuals towards various leaders and each other seems to have increased and grown harsher. We are being critical of our government, our schools, our churches and many others. We hold others to an impossibly high standard that we could never meet ourselves. Most of us are at home more and we scroll through social media, read news articles and become experts in everything. No matter what decisions are made about anything, as usual somebody is going to be upset. I would suggest as many others have said, now more than ever, is the time for Christ followers to extend grace when at all possible. It is also admittedly harder than ever to extend that grace.

The book of James is one of my favorite books in the Bible. James gives it to us straight and I appreciate that.

Speak and act as those who are to be judged by the law of freedom. For judgment is without mercy to the one who has not shown mercy. Mercy triumphs over judgment. – James 2:12-13 (CSB)

Brothers and sisters, do not complain about one another, so that you will not be judged. Look, the judge stands at the door! – James 5:9 (CSB)

I have found that asking myself the following things before I speak or write something critical has often silenced my tongue. Thinking through these things has prevented much embarrassment and shame on my part and wounded spirits for others.

• Why am I being critical of this particular decision, statement, lack of action or what have you? Often times if I examine my own heart, I find that there is a deeper issue that usually doesn’t have anything to do with the situation I’m mad about. It could be that I’m still angry about a past situation. Maybe I’m scared, worried or feel out of control about a different situation in my life. Maybe I have unconfessed sin in my life. Maybe I feel entitled to something. It is helpful to rule out anything else being the deeper reason for my frustration over something.
• Have I prayed about this situation or for this person? Have I really though? In general, I have found that when I’m praying for someone, it is obnoxiously hard for me to stay mad or frustrated at them. When I pray for wisdom, integrity and strength for leaders, I find it’s a little easier for me to patient, encouraging and gracious when they are making hard decisions.
• Is this a biblical issue or one that is simply about preference or opinion? There is still room for interpretation even among biblical issues but if it’s simply my opinion or preference, maybe I should remain quiet.
• Is there a way I can help? Sometimes there is nothing I can do but pray. However, sometimes there are ways that we can help leaders who may be overloaded and need some practical assistance. This obviously varies depending on the circumstance but it’s always worth asking am I part of the problem or can I be part of the solution. It’s good to ask how I can help and then follow through if there is something I can do. Or better yet, I can see the need and step up to meet it without anyone having to ask.
• Am I playing an unfair comparison game? This is almost always dangerous territory. Unless we are truly comparing apples to apples (even then, it’s not always wise), we should be wary of saying that so-and-so is doing it this way or that way. Absolutely, it can be helpful to seek advice from others and watch how others are handling things. But for example, it’s not realistic to be mad that our small church with minimal staff and minimal budget isn’t live streaming worship songs and a sermon every Sunday in the same way the large church down the street is.
• Have I considered that there is more to this situation than I realize or understand? There are so many aspects to each situation that our leaders are having to weigh as they make decisions. I usually do not know the whole story and sometimes I have to trust that those who do will be wise in making the right decision at the right time.

There will be times when leaders (who are human) will make unbiblical, immoral or destructive decisions and it will have to be addressed. In those times, there is still a right way and a right time to vocalize criticism, concern or correction. I can come to the table to pick a fight, prove my point or desire to see a leader fail. Or I can come with truth in love, covered in prayer and willing to forgive.

On the flip side of this, I have also been the recipient of criticism. I haven’t received criticism to the degree that I have seen others endure and it is not because I’m a leader having to make hard decisions. Sometimes the criticism was warranted, sometimes it wasn’t but it’s always hard to receive. It is in those moments when my feelings are hurt or I am righteously angry, that I have to choose to extend grace, examine my own heart and motives (possibly having to seek forgiveness) and respond in love and humility. Remembering how hurtful the criticism of others was allows me to hesitate before I speak ill towards or about others.

Right now there are so many things that are out of my control. But I am responsible for the things I can control. My attitudes (Romans 15:5), my thoughts (Philippians 4:8), my words (Colossians 3:17) and my actions (Philippians 1:27) will reveal more about my own heart than the ones they are directed to. I don’t want it to be said of me that I have a critical spirit. I want leaders and others to know that I am praying for them and doing my part to support, encourage and help during this time and beyond.

If you don’t effectively and consistently preach the gospel in your kids ministry, you will be missing a critical part of ministry.

However, it’s just as important to make sure that your kids know why they can and should be sharing the gospel with others. Kids are bold. With their childlike faith, they can easily talk about spiritual things with their peers and even other adults. Even more than that, if they are Christians, they should understand that making disciples is part of the great commission given to all who believe (Matthew 28:19-20).

In the area of kids ministry where I serve, we made it one of our goals this year to equip our kids to be comfortable and confident with sharing the good news of Jesus Christ with others. We are still learning what exactly this looks like and how best to be effective with this. However, we are doing several things to help our kids (and ourselves) be better at sharing the gospel on a regular basis with others.

Ongoing Conversation

Talking about the gospel message happens on a weekly basis with our kids. It’s not a singular event where we gather them all around and present a beautifully worded message and give a convicting (and often uncomfortable) invitation in hopes that some of them will respond. Those times can be good and sometimes necessary perhaps. However, I believe it’s more effective if we have a natural ongoing conversation about the gospel. The gospel message should be so familiar to our kids (and to us for that matter) that we are able to easily talk about it and point back to it in everything we are doing and teaching. The familiarity of the gospel doesn’t weaken the power of the message, but rather it should serve as our plumb line as we make sure that everything we do is in line with it. If the gospel is not in the forefront of everything we do, we can easily default to obeying God in our own power and strength. We should be so saturated in the gospel that it naturally leaks out in everyday conversations. And we should be intentional about pointing back to it during every teaching time and every activity we do.

Scripture Memory

Having scripture hidden in our hearts and engraved in our minds helps as we share with others. We strategically chose six verses to memorize with our kids this year that help us walk through the gospel message. We have spent a month on each verse which gives us time to talk about the verse in relation to the gospel and plenty of time for the kids to memorize the verse. Having a song that goes along with each verse has helped us all memorize them better. We also decided to offer incentives for the ones who memorize the verses to make it a little more fun. It is kids ministry after all. If you are interested, these are the verses we chose to get our kids to memorize: Colossians 1:16-17, Romans 3:23, Romans 6:23, Ephesians 2:8-9, Romans 5:8 and 1 John 1:9. Memorizing these scriptures in this particular order helps us talk through the gospel message with our kids and with others.

Tools

There are also several hands on tools that can be used to share the gospel. The gospel bracelets and wordless books are great because they are small and portable. They can be worn or attached to something like a bookbag. The kids can have the tool with them at all times and pull them out to share or talk about it someone sees it and asks about it. It also helps to have a physical tool in our hands to help guide our thoughts and keep what we say focused and concise. Also, if eye contact seems awkward for people, these tools also give you something to look at. We based how we are leading our kids through the gospel from this resource. The Gospel: God’s Plan for Me starts with creation and the perfection of the world before sin enters. For older kids and teens, something like The Three Circles method of evangelism can be helpful. This method starts with the brokenness of the world and leads to how Jesus can make us new again.

Practice

This may seem completely elementary, but by practicing sharing the gospel with each other first, helps us feel so much more comfortable sharing it with nonbelievers. As we say the words out loud to someone else, the more ingrained it becomes in our own hearts and minds. We often talk through the gospel out loud as a large group with the kids. We also recently had a night where we invited all the kids parents to come see what we have been learning. A few of the kids got to stand up and share the gospel with their own parents. Instead of making one kid share the entire gospel message, we broke it up into sections. Each kid said one of the memory verses and shared that part of the gospel. Hearing the kids share what they had learned and practiced was my favorite part of the night. It also helped give the kids confidence that if they can share the gospel with each other and their parents, they can share with others too. We are also looking forward to a night when we invite the senior adults in our church to join us. The kids will be using one of the tools mentioned above to practice sharing the gospel with our seniors.

Our hope and prayer as leaders and parents is that our kids will be ready and feel equipped to share the gospel with others wherever they go.

I love a good plan. Even if I don’t always stick to the original plan, I feel a calmness in my soul if I at least start a journey with a plan. I started this year with a solid Bible reading plan. It helps keep me on track and keeps me accountable. But the challenge for me about this particular “Read the Bible in 90 days plan” is that it estimated that it would take someone approximately 30 minutes a day to read through the Bible. For folks like me who can read fast but who like to take time to process things… it has actually taken me more like an hour a day thus far. Sometimes I like to read things more than once. And then sometimes I come across a verse like Joshua 5:12 and I just pause there for a while:

And the manna ceased the day after they ate of the produce of the land. And there was no longer manna for the people of Israel, but they ate the fruit of the land of Canaan that year.

I don’t know why this particular one was the verse that halted my reading rhythm today but it sure did make me stop and think. I read it several times and had to take some time to ponder. I’m still working through it in my heart and mind as I jot down these thoughts.

The Israelites had grumbled and complained, doubted and rebelled and often wished they had never left Egypt. They had some royal temper tantrums along the way. At one point Moses said they were too great a burden to carry (Numbers 11:14) and they angered God so bad that he threatened to make them go along their way without him lest he destroy them along the way (Exodus 33:3). Yet every single morning of their journey, God provided manna for them to eat. The Israelites were thrilled with this food at first but they eventually started to complain about it too. But because of the manna, they were sustained throughout their initial trek to Canaan and then on into their forty years of wandering in the wilderness.

The manna only stopped coming after they crossed the Jordan River and stepped foot into the Promised Land. Then they were able to eat the fruit of the land of Canaan. Only after God delivered them all the way to end of the journey and made sure they were in the land he had sworn to their fathers, only then did the manna stop.

This is just so fascinating to me. That one simple verse is so comforting. I don’t even fully understand all the parallels and symbolism here but I do know that I, just like the Israelites, can cling to God’s promises even though I rebel against him daily. I know way more of the story than the Israelites did and I still doubt and question. Perhaps it has even been to the point that he’s thought “this girl is too great a burden for me. (or maybe just too plain obnoxious)” But my God is long-suffering and faithful and so good to me even though I fail him.

God provides for us every single day of our earthly journey, even though we are prone to complain and want something more, different, better. He will be with us and He will give us our daily bread until we step foot into eternity. Then we will feast on every good thing heaven has to offer and worship our Lord forever. I can’t wait!

There is no arguing the fact that kid small group leaders are invaluable. It is kingdom work at it’s finest. It is a privilege and a great responsibility to point young ones to Jesus each week. Yet, most churches find it to be a yearly struggle to find enough volunteers to fill these positions. One of the biggest reasons seems to be, that people don’t want to give up their adult small group time. Fellowship and connection with other believers is so important in our walks of faith and for most, it’s deeply missed when it is absent.

So how can churches help their Kid’s Ministry teachers feel like they still have that needed adult support and fellowship?

Maintaining connection to an adult small group inside the church is a key part of helping kids teachers feel like they are still connected to the larger church as a whole. Part of this is the responsibility of the teachers. I highly recommend that churches only allow people to teach kids classes who are already established in the church and who have already connected to an adult group. This is for several reasons. Child safety and security is a huge reason. You should absolutely get to know people before you entrust them to teach your children’s classes. A background check alone should never be the only deciding factor in who you allow to be with your kids. However, it’s also important for adults to build relationships with other adults in the church before they step out and teach a kid’s class. When they maintain connection with an adult group, they are able to be cared for, prayed for and attend regular fellowship times with the group. I have seen people who were never connected to an adult group or people who have just joined a church and immediately got plugged into teaching a kids class. People who are willing to jump in and serve immediately are great, however without a committed deep connection before they start teaching, it’s much harder to make it happen later on. It’s a sad reality when you see teachers who were never connected to an adult group before they started teaching and when it came time for them to take a break from teaching, they felt they had no other real connection to the church. Some of them leave the church and some of them never really do connect to other adults. As a kids pastor or director, it’s also partly your responsibility to make sure each of your kids teachers is still assigned to an adult small group. Many churches offer alternative times for adult life groups. That is a great opportunity for teachers to still have an adult group of their own. Either way, pastors and leaders can encourage the adult life group leaders to keep kids teachers on the class email list, reach out to them occasionally for prayer requests, invite them to class events, etc. Being a kid’s teacher can so isolating and lonely. Making the effort to keep them connected to adult groups could play a huge role in maintaining your kids teachers year after year.

Teachers should also be encouraged to participate in other events and times of fellowship that the church offers. Every teacher, whether they teach kids, students or adults, should be attending corporate worship. That’s a biblical command. But many churches have mid-week adult bible studies, prayer meetings or fellowships. There’s women’s Bible studies, men’s group and plenty of other opportunities to fellowship with other adults. Kids teachers should be visible and present at things beyond Sunday morning. It’s an important part of being connected with your church.

Kids pastors can also get creative as to how they can develop fellowship and friendship among their teachers. Offering regular times of connection, fellowship and prayer time for your teachers is a great way to provide opportunities for teachers to interact, exchange ideas and have fellowship. Everyone is busy and no one has a ton of extra time to give these days. A big breakfast or lunch kick-off at the beginning of each year with time to decorate and prepare classrooms, give an overview of the year and get to know the other teachers is a great way to start. Offering early Sunday morning breakfast before class, lunch after the service or other times to meet, train and interact are great ideas. Make the most of those times, make it worth it for your teachers to attend these fellowship times and make sure they leave these times feeling encouraged and supported. Another easy way to develop fellowship among your teams of leaders could look like a Facebook group where they can weekly share ideas for the coming Sunday, share supplies or just post encouragements! Or send a group text once in a while to let your teachers know you just prayed for them. There’s so many great ways to help your teachers stay connected to each other.

Kids directors and pastors need to keep up with their leaders. They should be regularly communicating with teachers, know what’s going on in their lives and how they can be specifically praying for their leaders. Weekly emailing or calling all the kids teachers giving them encouragement for the week, making sure they are prepared with what they need for Sunday morning and sharing prayer requests can go a long way in reminding them they are seen and not forgotten each week. Teachers that feel alone, forgotten or unappreciated can easily get discouraged and quit.

If you are a kid’s leader, you are some of the most valuable servants in your church. We need you. I hope this encourages you to stay plugged in to adult groups at your church. You will be a better teacher who is less likely to burn out because of it. If you are a kid’s pastor or director, step up to plate and make sure your teachers are cared for. You may be pleasantly surprised at the end of the year how many decide to stay and teach if they are consistently connected in fellowship with other adults.

As an average American family, we have not suffered much for the cause of Christ in comparison to what many of our brothers and sisters in other parts of the world have. However, I do find myself too easily complaining over the small things I am asked to give up or changes I’m asked to make to be a follower of Jesus Christ.

In the fourteenth chapter of the book of Luke, Jesus turns to a large crowd that had been following him and He says;

Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple. ‘For which of you, wanting to build a tower, doesn’t first sit down and calculate the cost to see if he has enough to complete it?’

That sounds inviting, doesn’t it? Sign me up! We can easily misunderstand what this passage is saying. Jesus is not asking us to carry more burdens, for His yoke is easy and his burden is light. (Matthew 11:30) However, this is a call to completely surrender our lives to Christ. When we take up our cross, we are saying we are willing to die to ourselves. That includes our preferences, our comforts and our desires. In this dying to self, we then receive the life, joy and hope that can only come from the Lord. The call to carry our cross may still be costly, but the reward is priceless.

A couple of years ago, my family had a front row seat as we watched some of our close friends answer God’s call to move overseas as missionaries. We encouraged them as they took seminary classes. We prayed with them through the paper work and placement process. We helped them sort and tag all their belongings and hosted the yard sale. I had many conversations with my children about how this family was giving up everything… the American dream, having family and friends close by, and yes, even easy access to treasures like taco seasoning and honey mustard sauce. I explained to my kids that many others could hear the good news of the gospel because of our friends being obedient to God’s call. As the day neared to send this family off on a one-way trip across the ocean, I began to realize how emotionally hard this had been for my own family. My oldest son was losing his best buddy. My husband and I were sending away dear friends. I got emotional one day talking with my friend and she looked at me and said, “You are having to count the cost too, sister.” She was so right. I felt like what it was costing us nothing in comparison to their family, yet it still hurt. It was such a great joy to partner alongside our friends, but it was still hard. This was such a wonderful opportunity to talk with our children about sacrificing for the sake of the gospel.

I try to model that sacrificial lifestyle to my children. Jesus never promised an easy and luxurious life. We must continually choose His way or the world’s way. He asks us to take up our cross daily and follow Him. (Luke 9:23) It is an ongoing conversation with my children as we talk about sacrificing for the sake of the gospel. Our family continues to support and pray for our friends and my children continue to ask questions and watch this family sacrifice daily for the sake of the gospel. I want my children to be willing and ready to give or do whatever the Lord asks of them, no matter cost.  I pray that this journey of sending friends out will help mold my children’s hearts. I also pray that they will see that our obedience ultimately stems from our love and gratitude to God for all he has done for us. (John 14:15, John 14:23)

In this season of raising young children, my service for Christ looks different for me than it looks for my friend. But we believe Jesus paid the ultimate cost when he gave his life for us on the cross. While our sacrifices are often hard, they dim in comparison to what Christ has done for us. We don’t see it as a burden, but rather a joy and an honor to serve Him.

In Romans 12 we are called to be living sacrifices. In the Old Testament, people gave up their livestock as their sacrifices. Our sacrifices today may look more like giving up earthly comforts, possessions or ease. Being a living sacrifice means we willing climb up onto the altar and stay there. We don’t jump back down as soon as life starts to get painful. It is a sacrificial lifestyle that we are to offer as our act of worship. When we make the choice to stay on the altar and die to our own sins and desires, there is life, joy and blessings. When we keep an eternal perspective, it becomes easier for us to sacrifice for the sake of the gospel.

As my children grow up and begin making their faith their own, they will be asked to count the cost of following Jesus. It may cost my sons popularity, it may cost them sitting on the bench because they missed the Sunday morning soccer practice, it may cost them financially or even just cost them simple earthly comforts. My prayer for them is that in every choice and action, they will demonstrate that Jesus is more precious to them than anything else. By God’s strength and grace, I pray they see that same sacrificial spirit and heart of gratitude in me. We have to count the cost of being a disciple of Jesus Christ, but after we do, we will see that following Him is worth far more than anything we can imagine.

When it comes time to choose a curriculum for small groups or to reevaluate the one you are using, it’s a big deal. This should never be a flippant decision where you just “pick one” that looks good or seems easy to use. When we view small groups as a time for discipleship, we don’t see them as a program or babysitting hour. Curriculum is therefore a discipleship tool. Choosing the right one matters.

Our kid’s small groups have a purpose. Ultimately we are striving to make disciples who make disciples. So our end goal is for these kids to grow up and be spiritually mature adults who make disciples. How we get to that end goal matters.

Here are some things that I think are important to consider when choosing curriculum for your small groups:

How does the curriculum teach the Bible?

What kind of hermeneutical viewpoint does this curriculum use to approach scripture? Does it teach the Bible as one big story or separate unrelated stories? Does the curriculum point to scripture or is it merely someone’s opinion of scripture? Is God the main character of each story or do the lesson try to make us the main character? The Bible is about God – who he is, what he is like, what he has done. The Bible is not about us and trying to put ourselves into each story is dangerous territory.

Knowing what the purpose of your group is essential. Is it a women’s group that needs to study a certain topic, is it a group of teens that needs to look at real life issues or do you want to take several years and study the Bible from cover to cover? Do you want lessons that teach lecture style or do you prefer video based or discussion groups? While small groups can have slightly different purposes based on what kind of members are in them, every lesson should still point to Jesus.

Does the curriculum teach the gospel or moralism?

This question gets it’s own section because I see this as a flaw in so many resources. My first grader is learning how to have integrity, responsibility and perseverance at his public school. And that’s not a bad thing. Our kids do need to be taught those things. But the church’s priority should be to teach them the gospel. When our kids begin to have a heart transformation, the good behavior will follow. We need to look at curriculums closely to see if each lesson is simply wrapped up in a nice little moral lesson or if it teaches each story as part of the bigger story of scripture and how to see Jesus in that story. If all we are focused on is good behavior and doing good deeds to make God happy, our kids will miss the gospel altogether. They will not get how the good news affects their heart and life and they will be more likely to leave the faith.

What additional resources does the curriculum offer?

There are so many great resources available that add much value to curriculums. Look to see if there are things available like promotional material, posters and signs, teacher training, additional commentary, parent resources, participant take home resources, blogs, apps and second hour worship material. These things can be very helpful to teachers as they study and learn how to teach the lessons in an age appropriate and gospel-centered way. Parent resources are a great way to partner with parents and help them continue the conversation at home with their kids. Some curriculums even have adult, student and kid studies that line up so that the parents are studying the same lesson each week that their kids are learning. This is a valuable thing to consider and makes it even easier for the parents to follow-up at home during the week with their kids are learning at church at Sundays.

When it comes to the plethora of kids ministry resources that are available, here are some additional questions that I think are important to ask before you choose.

Is the material meant to entertain or disciple?

Do the lessons have a missional focus?

Does it teach feel just good lessons or does it address the hard things in scripture too?

Does it include ideas for all types of learners? 

Meaning, does it include music, active games, hands on projects, fun pictures, interactive dialogue, videos, etc. The material should be engaging for the ages you are teaching and for all kinds of learners. A good mix of low-prep and more involved activities are a great way to appeal to teachers that have different amounts of time and experience.

There are probably many other things to consider when you’re looking at curriculums. Knowing the overall goal of your groups and keeping the end in mind will help you prayerfully determine which curriculum is best for your groups.